Funny Ass Questions

I know, your Queen does not use words like *ass* in her normally staid dealings, but I am trying to loosen up a little in my old age. And while I am completely fine with repeating myself and usually don't even notice it, I feel that I should post another Instructions Post for all those people new to Jell-O Art who would make some if they only knew how easy it is. Fortunately the newbies and their questions keep coming, and in my archives is a real FAQ for me to reference.

Our first question comes from our old friend Maude: There are other Jell-O Shows? Yes, in fact, there are all kinds of them. Gowanus Studios in Brooklyn NY had at least two in their fancy design studio, where they required all kinds of conditions, such as edibility and actual design expertise. Ours, of course, requires only that you show up with $3 (you can sneak in on the admission donation if you have the nerve but it does support the gallery and is only another $3) and something with some amount of gelatin in it. We probably don't even require the gelatin, in fact I remember one exhibit that was a pile of Jell-O boxes, called Oh, Fuck it. At least there was proof that they had purchased the Jell-O, which of course I do not officially recommend as it is made by an evil corporation and includes no food in its ingredient list. And the cows, you know. But of course, true art requires sacrifice of someone. Better the cows than I. And oh yes, an artist named Liz Hicock made a lot of famous Jell-O Art and you might find others if you search online. The last time I did that it was horrifying to wade through that many selfies drinking shots (not me, I don't like vodka) and people making rainbow desserts. There is, however a lot of dried gelatin cake-ornamenting now and those gorgeous injected flower things that are very hard to make. I know, I tried it last year and mine were lame. Of course lame Jell-O Art is still pretty interesting. Google your heart out.

 Then the perennial element of surprise: WtF? Jell-O Art is made from gelatin, dye and water. Mine is air-dried and glued together with more gelatin. I don’t actually use Jell-O Brand gelatin but call it Jell-O Art because it comes from the Jell-O Art tradition. I don't use the brand stuff for the reasons above, and because I am thrifty and use a lot of it, and you really don't need all that sugar. Really, you don't, because to make good sculpture your media must be pure. And unadulturated. But go ahead and use what you have and are willing to buy. It's very hard to duplicate that berryblue color.



Can You Eat It? Every craft comes with an annoying question. The current answer is “Why would you want to?” It is technically edible except for the dye, which is toxic in its powdered form, though in such tiny amounts that you would live. The gelatin itself is perfectly edible, so yeah, lost in the woods with your gelatin slug-on-a-stick, it's probably tastier than the live ones. No sugar or flavorings though in mine. Bring your own salt.

This brings up another type of Jell-O Art, as there are shows in which Jell-O creations are made to eat and exhibited like cakes in a bake-off or a County Fair. We had a superb artist of this type who drove down from Seattle one year with five excellent pieces, primed to win the competition. He was probably devastated to see that we have no competition, actively discourage it in fact, and relegate our edible stuff to the Tacky Food Buffet where lots of people eat it without a second thought. I'll try every new recipe just to see, but generally I like some food in my food. We have another artist who usually makes an old and real recipe and I always eat hers, as by that time of day I am starved and need some tuna aspic or chocolate-covered brussels sprouts or a salad with carrots and celery in it. The Tacky Food Buffet is a very popular feature of our show and feel free to bring something technically and legally edible to donate to that. Family friendly, except for all the sugar and chemicals.

How do you make it? I tell all my secrets on this blog but you have to wade through a lot of attempted wittiness now to find any helpful facts. To make the dried kind, you just make it very thick, mix it in cold water, let it bloom, then melt it and pour it into molds or pans. I like to use glass pie plates but the dried can actually pull off parts of the pyrex so don't use those for food. Keep them in your Jell-O studio for use next year. 

Let it air dry in a warm spot like the top of the piano, and tend it by turning it over and doing things to it (it will stretch and curl), and then select pieces and glue them together with the gelatin. No other glues, coatings, or enhancers are used. Try it yourself with the Knox brand plain gelatin. I use 3 oz per cup of water.

If you want the jiggly kind, just mix it a bit strong, like maybe use half or a fourth of the water recommended on the package.The Jigglers recipe works for edibility but for sculpture it's still too melty. You don't want your sculpture to melt, unless you do want your sculpture to melt. Tastes vary.

 

What’s so great about it? The dried gelatin, at least, has a randomness that is just amazing, as it curls itself up and shapes itself while drying. It is practically weightless, so wearing it on your head is really easy and spectacular. It looks outrageous in sunlight. It’s something you never saw before! You need new brain pathways just to integrate the possibilities.

The Jell-O Art Show itself  is an ephemeral and precious event that only lasts for three hours (say, is this anything like the voyage of the Minnow on Gilligan's Island? Another post someday.) on a night at the end of spring break when nothing much else is happening anyway. It's five to eight pm so you can go out later to eat real food or see a real show (no offense to us Radar Angels, who do put on a real show). People like me spend all year or at least the previous three months planning and writing a performance and practicing for it and sewing costumes and getting up their nerve, not to even mention making art pieces that might be spectacular. Sure, a lot of them get thrown in the compost but that is not because they aren't fantastic art. Once you try to work with Jell-O you will get how it can hold your interest for 27 years. It's not an easy medium and the possibilities seem rather endless for interpretation and technique. The theme is optional and changes every year, and there are no rules! Plus you can exhibit whatever you damn well please with no judges, evaluators, credentials, or critical structure attached. How many gallery shows are open like that? You, yourself, or your five-year-old can be a real, capital-A Artist with just a little bit of fun and effort, and I do guarantee you that if you look at the exhibits you will find one that will amaze and edify you and get those juices flowing. It is so great!

This one will be for sale. $25, or make your own.

I can say that without the slightest reservation or defensiveness. Jell-O Art made me an artist. I make my living as an artist and have for most of my life. You sell Jell-O? 

Yes, yes I do. I will have a limited amount of lovely pieces for sale that you can wear on your head, flowers and things that look a little like flowers. You can try them on and admire yourself if I remember to bring a mirror. I will also sell t-shirts if I get off the internet and get the design done soon. (I will.) There could be other things to buy, who knows? The element of surprise is always present in our rarified atmosphere.

And our last question: Is it really Art? Oh, the age old question. Art is in the mind of the artist and the beholder. You will have to see for yourself. But, Maude Kerns Art Center is a real Art Center. They now have a piece of Jell-O Art in their permanent collection, which will be kept in the climate-controlled vault with the founder's paintings. This is not even a question in my mind, but I had to put it here so I could mention the permanent collection. I only wish I had a picture of it to post, but here it is hidden just behind me where I am posing with the other Maude, who doesn't ask many questions these days. I do wonder what she would say, but maybe it's better if we don't know. 

Go make some Jell-O! It does eventually compost, or get eaten by varmints out in your compost pile, if you don't want to serve your experiments to your family. It's usually on sale around Easter, which is is now. You have no excuse! I know I don't.