Working with the green screen, multiple cameras, and the ability to practice on camera is a whole new dimension for us. It takes a lot of the pressure out of trying to do the live show. It's a good thing because we started so late, had such a small group, and had so much trouble settling on a plan, we had to get it together in only a couple of weeks, without a single rehearsal the way we used to do it.
Costume changes can be elaborate and there is plenty of time to switch out accessories, readjust expectations, and even rewrite lines at the last minute to tighten things up. There's no anxiety about forgetting lines, as we can do it several times until we get it polished.
We had a blast today, just a small group of us cracking each other up with extra jokes, snide remarks and little songs in between takes. I think my favorite moment was at the end of the four-hour session, when we were just recording a little bit of vocals for a number we weren't in...we all started dancing in front of the mic and it felt like we were really stars goofing around together like the oldest of coworkers.
We've been together such a long time. I've only been performing for ten years now, but they have been memorable and have filled my soul. I can't believe I could have been doing it for twenty years before that if I hadn't been living another, more reclusive life.
I always told myself I had stage fright and couldn't sing live in front of people, though obviously I never did in chorus as a kid or with my family or friends. Telling myself limiting stories about what I could or couldn't do was a habit that provided me some kind of protection but it was a real life lesson to find out how easily a story can be disproven with a little supportive encouragement and patience from some of the lovely people I have been honored to know. It took a long time to get me on stage, and I had to be somewhat dragged, but I hope it was worth the effort. I do love it now. Having the Queen persona is liberating as well...it's me, but not really...she can do lots of things I would be reluctant to do in public. It surprises me that people don't seem to understand that. It makes me giggle that when I say I am dull and a hermit that they see that extroverted social persona and don't know which one to believe in. I mean, if I have Jell-O on my head, I'm the Queen. If I don't, I'm just working or have my nose in a book. (And this is beside the point of this essay, but I am reading Davy Rothbart's book My Heart is An Idiot and it's delightful.)
This morning I was a little resentful to give up my last free Saturday before Market starts, but I sat down early and thought I'd write a few lines for people who were planning to improvise, in case they were still unsure what they would say. I ended up writing four fake news stories in less than an hour, just naturally and without any real effort. I laughed myself. At the same time as I sent them out to the troupe I knew that most or all of it would not make it into the show, and I wasn't at all attached to that...all of our artists are free to do what they choose with little interference from the rest of the group. I just was having fun doing it. I wanted more. I feel that now, too, that familiar disappointment that it all didn't last quite long enough.
We do work together to make the creation, and writing the script is mostly an exercise for me of trying to imsgine enough of a narrative to make everyone's separate parts fit together in some kind of relationship to each other. Our brainstorming sessions are wild fun that we all treasure. The little ways we are hilarious are so endearing and adorable. Each person has their style of it...some at the beginning, coming in fully fixed on an idea or a character, some hanging back and coming in near the finish with something that puts the humor over the top. You might be able to tell that in the performance if you know some of the performers, or maybe not. I find out more of it every time we do this thing together.
We're lucky to be in this little window of the pandemic where people who are vaxxed and careful can take a little bit of a risk and get together in the same room. This was the first time in two years I unmasked and sort of forgot about dying and killing others by breathing. I'm masked again of course, as I know what's coming and know the window is rapidly closing and will likely remain closed for several months, again. Again! It's hard to do it again, but I'm still determined not to get sick and above all, not to make someone else sick. I'm prepared to sacrifice a lot of things for that. But I'm glad we didn't sacrifice performing together for it this year.
So I'm so grateful for this fun we had. Next Saturday is the Jell-O Art Show, where we will all see the recording for the first time, surrounded by the jiggly and elaborate sculptures of other people coming hesitantly out of isolation for a moment. Let's enjoy what freedom we each feel we can claim, briefly, to feel joy and celebrate the spring. We're having another spring! We're having another Jell-O Art Show! What a wonderful world it can be.
